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Wednesday, May 11, 2005

Craigslist Casual Encounters

Commenting on this would just ruin it...30-something asian professional looking for love believes this is his way to find it:
Do you have any yellow fever or Asian persuasion? While you are looking for Prince Charming which can take years in LA, why dont you meet your sexual needs with this smart, funny imported beefcake as your friend and fuck buddy? Since your Milkshake brings all the boys to the yard, let me Usher you to my Candy Shop. I am not Mick Jagger but I can get you Satisfaction. I am not Elton John, but Can You Feel the Love Tonight?
Do you have any Chinese in you? If not, I can give you some with no G-string attached, and you can even have a ball .... :) I can open more Doors than Jim Morrison, so Cum On Baby, Light My Fire. Save drama for your mama, and enjoy some original comedy with me. I may not be a De Beers diamond, but I can last forever. I am not Robert Redford, but I can write a pretty Indecent Proposal. I am not Billy Joel, but I like you Just The Way You Are. I am Sweet n Low, because I have no Equal, and can Work It better than Missy Elliott.

Got Milk? I am a weapon of ass seduction, a muscular alpha male, confident, exotic, erotic, intelligent (MS CalTech, USC PhD program with a Lick Her license), discreet, diclicious, juicy, cerebral, and funny Asian stud, 30 years young, 69 inches, 185lbs, works out daily, non-smoker, disease and drug-free, smooth, shaved, hot but way cool, well hung but not cocky, thick and uncut for your Sugar Walls. I love animals, and can lick your kitty, spread your eagle, do a doggie, taste your Red Bull, kiss your Jaguar, or horse around with the cock. I am not Madonna, but I can Juicify My Love. I am not George Michael, but I Want Your Sex. I can host since I have nice condo near Westwood Village and Sports Club LA with heated swimming pool, sundeck, tanning chairs, koi pond, waterfall, lush landscaping, jacuzzi, steam room, gym, personal sauna, French music, satin sheets, and decorated with art and statues.

I am not Cameron Diaz or Russell Crowe, but I am The Sweetest Thing with A Beautiful Mind. I am not Marvin Gaye, but I can give you Sexual Healing. I am not Al Pacino, but I enjoy Scent of a Woman. I am spiritual, witty, can make you laugh, connect with you on many levels, and fill you with more Passion than Mel Gibson. I am not an Oscar winner, but I am a Million Dollar Baby for a goddess who can ANALyze This. I love to go downtown on an Uptown Girl because I am a more cunning linguist than The Interpreter who can cumfort you regularly as a friend with benefits, or if we click, supply more LTR than a nympho can swallow.

I am a porn-again Christian who disagrees with the Pope on contraception and celibacy, so cum play with my bishop, get baptized with holy fluids, and cummit a cardinal sin. I am Home Alone in Westwood so you can just bring your bikini and swim/jacuzzi/sauna with me, have some wine, nuts, mushroom, sausage, conversation, and creampie, watch DVD, enjoy my humor, get under my foreskin, and receive a facial. I can rock you better than Rod Stewart, so if you want my body and if you think I am sexy, just reach out and let me know. I look gorgeous naked, and can outlast the Energizer bunny for your Close Encounter of the Wild Kind, so email me stats, pics and perhaps your # so I can fulfill your Booty Call and be the boy toy in your Happy Meal. I am not Orlando Bloom, but I can give you a taste of the Kingdom of Heaven. I am not Elvis, but I will Love You Tender.

La Perla bra & thong $250
Jimmy Choo shoes $400
Tiffany diamond ring $18,000
Finding a talented Chinese Takeout who can make you laugh AND cum......priceless

Buff Eddy