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Wednesday, November 30, 2005

University of the South


Continuing their series on crazy people, the New York Times discussed the University of the South today to a nation's collective yawn. "There really are people like this?" most Times readers asked, viewing those who attend the University of the South as backwards Good Ole Boys and LSU rejects (often the same). Further proving the fragile status of the United States higher educational system, Dr. (!) David Aiken remarked about changes to the University of the South (which include such radical steps as removing a ceremonial baton dedicated to a Confederate general who helped found the Ku Klux Klan, as well as numerous confederate flags),
"I think they ought to leave it the way it is," said Dr. David W. Aiken, an alumnus who is an orthopedic surgeon in Metairie, La. "I wouldn't be for changing anything. I think they're doing quite well. What is the purpose of making it a more national school? Do I want kids from California, New York coming there? (Read: Jews) Not really."
Dear kids from California and New York: STAY HERE. IT'S BETTER, I PROMISE. Go to a community college if you must, then transfer upstate or to UC Riverside if necessary. Yes, shocking I know, but if you think the valley or Buffalo are hell, you ain't seen nothing yet. Don't trust me? I'd hope I don't have foot trouble if I were you...

Edit: Sorry about the yarmulke being backward. Google Images let me down, once again...